What I’ve Learnt About Myself During Lockdown

What I’ve Learnt About Myself During Lockdown

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With the lockdown restrictions easing most people it seems are happy to get back to shopping and cram on a beach with thousands of others – for me, however, that seems like a long way off, while others seemingly are getting back to normal, I’m embracing lockdown life and I’ve learnt a few things about myself along the way.

I think I was addicted to buying clothes

I know a fashion blogger addicted to buying clothes isn’t a revelation, but I actually realised that my relationship with shopping, a leisurely stroll around the shops, was centred purely around clothes. I mainly bought clothes because they were on-trend, they looked great on others, which actually most of the time looked awful on me, and generally, I bought because I felt like I needed something new and shiny.

Those first few weeks of lockdown, I did a lot of tidying and sorting, and I realised a lot of clothes had price tags still attached, yep, I’d bought, hung them up and then not actually worn, and guess what, those clothes generally didn’t fit or looked awful.

Weekend, Weekend Routine, Weekend in isolation,

Having this time, away from the shops, really has made me think about the clothes I already own, what’s missing from my wardrobe, and how badly I want something, and will I actually wear it, as well as the quality of my clothes.

That’s not to say I haven’t bought anything new, what I’m wearing is from the new H&M x Desmond & Dempsey collection, but what I have bought, just four items since March and all were summer items perfect for the garden and picnic meet-ups that I just didn’t have already.

Nice to have company

While I love working from home, I did before lockdown, it has been nice having my husband around more. While yes, I do miss the quiet, he has a lot of Zoom calls, I like the fact I have a lunch buddy, someone else who makes tea, Falcon is good at a lot of things making a cuppa isn’t one of them, as well as someone else to bounce ideas off.

Being freelance is amazing, I like working my own hours, but it can sometimes be lonely, the house will be awfully quiet when he goes back into the office, but that looks like it will be some time off yet.

Weekend, Weekend Routine, Weekend in isolation,

I love gardening

We’ve lived in our forever house now for coming up to 3 years and I’m finally embracing the large garden. In the past, I have to admit, I’ve been happy for it to just be grass, as grass cutting is a husband chore that he loves as he has one of those sit down mowers, but now I’m finally seeing the potential of the garden.

We have a large garden, with a patio wrapped around the back of the house, next to a paddock, and a front garden. The majority of the garden hasn’t changed since we moved in, yes, we’ve added a few more pots on the patio, but nothing major – well now dreaming up of kind of plans – like a greenhouse, a vegetable patch, a cutting garden, as well as a magical cottage garden to the front to really showcase off our gorgeous listed home.

I really can’t wait to show you everything I’m putting together, we might not have the perfect garden this year, but 2021 will certainly be magical.

It is OK, to not be OK

This one is difficult, for ages I hid when I wasn’t feeling OK, my husband would always know, and I would be quick to say “I’m fine,” well you know what, I’m not OK all the time, and I’m starting to come to terms with the fact that it is OK. Acceptance is the first step to healing why you don’t feel OK. Self-love, especially at times like this, is important.

Weekend, Weekend Routine, Weekend in isolation,

Everything doesn’t have to be perfect right now

This is a big realisation. The more time I’ve spent at home, the more I’ve come to be conclusion that everything doesn’t need to be perfect right now. Yes, we’ve been in this house a few years, yes, not much has changed, granted a new kitchen, a few rooms have had their floorboards sanded and repaired, the conservatory got a makeover with new windows, and a couple of rooms have been given a fresh look with paint – but there is still so much to be done.

But I’ve realised my rush to get things done was down to being influenced elsewhere, it seems to be a trend lately that bloggers buy houses and then gut them and change them overnight – wouldn’t it be nice to have that sort of money!!!

For us, that just hasn’t been a possibility, for a start we’ve been waiting for nearly 6 months on getting planning permission for a project, which means everything else goes on hold, as you don’t know how much it will cost or when it will happen. Lockdown really has helped me take these delays a little better before they would have stressed me out and I would have been worrying for weeks, now it really isn’t the worst thing that can be happening.

But lockdown has also meant that I’ve been planning, deciding what needs to be done, like the bathrooms, the repairing of the windows, painting the outside, the dresser needs to be updated, my dressing room needs doing, and much, much more. It is a long list, from DIY projects to builders, but you know what, it will get done, just not all at once!

I miss people

Stick with me, I know, we are all missing our family and friends, but what I didn’t realise about myself was how much I would miss being around other people, even people I don’t even know. I kind of miss the noise, the buzz of sitting in a cafe while I tap away on the keyboard of my laptop. It is a silly thing, as to be honest I thought I would thrive as a hermit.

Scrolling less makes me happier

I’ve struggled for a while with social media, I love the inspiration but I find the tiresome drive for likes, followers and newness quite draining, and lockdown has made me realise that I actually don’t care about a lot of what I was seeing and engaging with.

My Instagram feed has changed quite a bit since March, for the better I think, but it really shows that changing something slightly has a negative effect on follower numbers, which are leaving every day. But it has made me think – would starting over be such a bad thing to get back to doing what I loved, to share my photographs? I think that is a debate for another day!

Slowing down isn’t being lazy

Is everyone else around you sharing accomplishments, like finishing their novel, learning a language, or claiming to be in the best shape ever? Well, I’ve come to realise that slowing down, embracing lockdown isn’t being lazy and that having downtime is just that and I should enjoy it while it lasts and if I want a movie marathon day then I can, and I’m going to enjoy the fuck out of it.

I touch my face, a lot

Last thing I’ve learnt during lockdown is that I really do touch my face a lot, I’m constantly touching my glasses, leaning on my chin, moving my hair off my face, and I thought I rarely did it. Plus, when you can’t do something, you really just want to do it more. Anyone else currently untraining themselves out of bad habits?

What have you learnt about yourself in lockdown? 

Wearing the cotton-blend maxi dress from the H&M x Desmond & Dempsey collection – buy the dress here (Aff Link) and read my post on the range here.